Apparently No Man or AstroMan? Fans At ODOT: Little Debbie Snack Cakes In Accident Hauled To The Landfill

A date at the bottom of an Oregon landfill is the end result for a truckload of Little Debbie snack cakes. An accident on Highway 217 Monday evening resulted in the truck and the trailer ending up on its side. Rather than salvaging what they could for food banks around the state, the products have been unceremoniously dumped at the dump. Given the long shelf life of the sweet treats, I'm sure they would've been in decent shape the next time that Man or Astro-Man? hit the road again.



KATU NEWS STORY




A lovely live video of the band, complete with theremin on fire, in Seattle in 2000 (thanks brianjbean!),

Today's Nude News To Use: Ultimate Frisbee & Hiking Ban

A choice between two stories that feature some nudity with unusual twists: the first being the University of Oregon's club ultimate frisbee team having their season canceled for a number of incidents, the latest being the two squads that form the team playing each other WITH ONE TEAM SANS SHIRTS, THE OTHER WITHOUT PANTS OR UNDERWEAR.


I'd certainly rather be playing that sport in that manner rather than hiking in the nude through the Swiss countryside, where startled citizens of a tiny canton have now started fining GERMAN NUDISTS as they ramble free as a bird over hill and dale.

Idiot Of The Day Award

(actually, for a lot longer than that probably!) That would be the clueless a-hole driving north on Main Steet in Springfield today, about 1 p.m., by the light/crosswalk just south of the Safeway store.


A disabled man in a scooter was crossing the street legally (all of the lights were red, and weren't about to turn green; I could see the east/west lights from my company vehicle). He'd made it to the first of the northbound lanes, just past the turning lanes, and was a second or two from reaching the farthest of those lanes, when said idiot blows past the red light without slowing down at all, missing that poor gentlemen by just a couple of feet. Doesn't really matter that he was doing the speed limit, I can speak for the cars in front of me that the vision of that soul being splattered by some careless asshole was something we were going to have to quickly deal with. I was in the left lane going north, ready to reach my next stop just past the 126 interchange. Fortuntely, the guy in the scooter stopped just in time and everyone breathed huge sigh of relief.



To compound the stupidity of the situation, this idiot turned into the Safeway parking lot and calmly got out of his car, going about his business (he wasn't going to the grocery store, but rather one of the other businesses sidling the lot next to Main Street); unfortunately, the traffic was moving by this point and I could not get over to the right hand lane to ask this guy what in the world he was thinking about, all I can sincerely hope is that karma soon teaches this young man to think about more than himself at all times.

Because Inter Are The New Knights Templar?

News that a Turkish lawyer is suing Italian football club Inter Milan for wearing a kit whose shirt resembled a red cross on a white background which would be considered ”offensive to Muslim sensibilities” as these shirts apparently recall the Crusades. Not just suing the club is enough for this gentleman, he's also seeking to overturn the results of Inter's match with Turkish side Fenerbahce as well, which is when the Italian club wore the new shirt. Have to wonder why the St. George's Cross flag hasn't come under more scrutiny by this point in time. The rest of the story of this PC-world gone mad, from the London Times, is HERE, a pic of the new strip is on the right, photo by Marco Bucco.

No More 'Naked Twister' Nights

A CNN ARTICLE about a Dallas, TX suburb banning sex clubs in residential areas. Too much traffic in these areas according to the local naysayers, it's quite odd that people easily willing to swap bodily fluids can't manage to either come up with a good carpooling idea or split a cab to the house. If such a banning comes to this area, I'll most certainly have to come up with a new bedroom décor. Drat it.

Irresistible Force Vs. Immovable Object

Having driven vehicles that are over 10 feet tall for work, one of the most important rules is to be aware of areas of low clearance. We've had some close calls, along with a couple of accidents in that regard, one involving the parking structure at Salem City Hall and one, involving yours truly, with the drive thru at the Taco Time in Sweet Home. For the record, the facts in my accident are that I had enough clearance at the top to drive through, with inches to spare; what I failed to take into consideration was how wide the span at the place was, the result being that I knocked down several tiles on either side of the arches. Nothing ever came of that incident, as there really wasn't much damage.



The incident in Salem peeled back a few inches of the box, before the driver realized what was going on and backed out. This accident required some major restoration work on the truck, whereas the result from mine was a couple of minor indentations at the top of the box unit on both sides.


Anyway, I've always kinda wondered what would happen if a too-tall truck went through a low clearance area.........completely? . No need to wonder anymore, as the story in today's New York Times tells the tale of a Texas trucker and the Lincoln Tunnel. The NYT photo by Oscar Hidalgo shows the "after" result from the clash alluded to in the title of this post.



STORY

Red Light Red Light....Run It

"......there ain't nobody watching........run it!". Thank you to Paul Westerberg for that lyrical gem over twenty years ago, but that won't be the case in Albany any more, what with the location of the first red-light camera being announced today.


Said intersection to have cameras installed will be the eastbound Ninth and Geary route as well as northbound Geary at Ninth. Apparently there are lots of scofflaws who routinely make a California roll through a red light, without a full stop, so a plan has been implemented for the safety of us all. As one who drives for a living in a commercial vehicle, it's a nice to see such a help, all too often I watch these cars making improper turns and it drives me nuts, I know for damn well that someone would call our boss and tell him about our driving. For the record, such a thing did happen at that intersection, but it was on the first day of the new intersection, east bound, when people could either continue left on Pacific in the far left, or right and go to the Santiam Highway. I was in the second lane from the left, by Walgreens, when a lady in the lane to my right, bound for the Santiam road, decided that the Pacific lane was where she should be, and how rude of me to be in her way. It was only a couple of minutes later when I got the phone call, and everybody had a good laugh when I told them exactly what had happened, they were almost expecting such a thing. Luckily, things have quieted down on that particular road. However, it's the westbound traffic where Pacific and Santiam meet that need some more attention.......



In the article, it doesn't mention any cameras for the southbound Geary lanes, the ones coming from downtown, even though I've seen lots of people running that one. A bit odd, but I guess the numbers from the test show that there aren't enough of those to justify one.


RED LIGHT

Jury Duty Calls: It's My Responsibility

I really did get my jury duty notice, for the city, on Thursday the 15th, for the second time of my life, the first was back in the early 80's. I've also registered for the federal jury pool a few years ago, but I'd never heard anything since. I was also called upon, when living in Salem, to serve on the jury for the case in the murder of Michael Francke, the Oregon director for the Department Of Corrections. Very bad timing had me handing in a request to be excused (just started a new term of school, no one could replace me at work without hardship, etc.)


Gonna let the juvenile aspect of my character take over for a second and hope that any of the upcoming cases that I may get called to serve upon might be like the one down in New Zealand, whereupon a female solicitor gave testimony to the court topless, in a case involving a man and some apparently inappropriate touches during a massage. The full story of this case is HERE.



I'll grow up again and say that honestly that it really wouldn't be that big of a deal; this lady did what she had to do, no more and no less, and any kind of reaction other than that is just wide of the mark of recognizing some of the tricker aspects in the relationships between men and women.



No artists rendering of the courtroom action have yet surfaced, and the defense attorney has promised the lady that "....we can promise you it won't appear on YouTube," given that her testimony was videoed for testimonial purposes.

Al Sharpton On Slavery To Strom Thurmond

Powerful stuff about an awful period of ours, or anyones, history. Al Sharpton, in today's Los Angeles Times, relates his feelings on his finding out that his forefathers were enslaved and owned by the family of the late Strom Thurmond, a United States Senator who was a fierce segregationist.


Despite the burning knowledge of the subjegation that was forced on way too many members of one specific race from another, Sharpton realizes that .....rage will do no good for Coleman Sharpton's descendants or the Thurmond descendants. My family and the Thurmond family must rise above the ugly, shameful past that binds us, just as America must come out of denial and seek to repair the damage that slavery has done and to eliminate the bigotry that still lingers.



Not an easy conclusion to arrive at, even harder to implement fully without the realization of the utterly dehumanizing idea of slavery, and the natural seeds of anger and distrust that such actions have set upon all of mankind. Is this what our God had in mind for all of us? The wheels of enlightenment are obviously turning way too slowly to right the wrongs of the past.






STORY

Got The "Can't Throw Anything Away" Blues?

A Massachusetts woman certainly does, and the accumulation leads to an auto accident. I will say that the car looks to be in a lot better shape than the cars I see filled with trash around here do (speaking about the outside of course).





CAR

Leave It To The Schools To Teach Sex Ed

A Woonsocket, R.I. woman and her boyfriend are facing felony charges after her 9-year old girl had told authorities that the two of them often had sex in front of her, to teach her about the basics of sex. All I can think about is that scene from Monty Python's The Meaning Of Life where John Cleese is trying to instruct a roomful of bored schoolboys, who'd rather focus on the scenery outside, or an ocarina, than on the basics of sexual education as Cleese has sex with his wife in class. Wait.....what....life isn't like it is in the movies?




LET IT ALL HANG OUT

Muscles For Brains

Don't help me I can save myself
If I'm incomplete don't fill the gaps
Save me from the people who would save me from myself
They got muscle for brains

For reasons that are not mysterious
The weak are sent to the wall
They have reservations in heaven
Down here they're not so fashionable





Thank you once again, Gang Of Four, for once again saying what needed to be said lyrically over 20-odd years ago. Another proposed effort in an the race to have our lives micro-managed to eliminate every last possible area of danger, all of the missing, unaccounted nuclear material in the world notwithstanding. This time iPods and cellphones while crossing the streets of New York City.





SAY WHAT???

A Man Really Does Fall For The Nigerian Scam

Just noting this as it happened, not wishing to pile on the unfortunate individual any more than that, but as one person is quoted in the article, "What was he thinking?" . I guess people are gonna believe what they're gonna believe, and that nothing bad will ever happen to them.


STORY

I Wanna Create (My Own Pet Cemetary)

Not if the law in Tennessee has anything to do about it, apparently. A Murfreesboro man is suing the state for emotional distress three years after 114 frozen cat carcasses, along with a number of live animals, were removed, and later destroyed, from his property. More weird details below.








FULL STORY

Complaints About Muslim Taxi Drivers In Minnesota

Specifically, complaints about Muslim taxi drivers at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport refusing to carry passengers who have alcohol, apparently in their luggage, or are using a service dog, in their taxi cab.


Public hearings are now underway to help solve the growing problem in the Twin Cities area, with a possible outcome being the suspension of licenses of drivers who refuse any customer for anything other than for personal safety reasons.

Presumably the drivers are asking prospective customers before being engaged if they are in possession of alcohol; it's not like they'll be cracking open a fifth in the back seat and passing the bottle back and forth, cause the luggage will be in the trunk, so the absolute denial of service on this issue is a bit puzzling to me.

The refusal of service dogs is also baffling, I should imagine helping a person in need would transcend religious boundaries, a basic tenet of all religions regardless of one's belief. This denial of service obviously has a negative impact, especially if one is eager to show the good side of Islam toward a skeptical American public.




STORY

You Better Jump...We Wanna Dump,....Some Goo Goo Muck

The problem in Florida is now where to dispose of more than 18,000 tons of soggy muck, from a road-widening project, and which now sits on the side of the road in the construction zone. Previous agreements for disposal of said muck in a state park have fallen through via concerns over material in the muck, some of which is reported to have started massive algae blooms in some of the Floridian waters. Of course, there are always new concerns and questions that need to be asked in such environmentally sensitive issues, and the bottom line for most people, aside from the contractor, legally responsible for the disposal of the muck, and the Department Of Transportation, who initially okayed the dumping plan, is "Why take a chance?" I think I heard that line in a gangster movie before.


MUCK ADO ABOUT A LOTTA MUCK

Top Ten States For Biggest Speeding Tickets

I had absolutely no idea that the fines for speeding here in Oregon were among the highest in the United States. Being that I tend to be very calm and relaxed when it comes to being behind the wheel, I suppose that the penalties for the violators of the speed limit had just escaped my notice; my motto when driving is "I'd rather get there later than not at all", which pertains to reckless drivers weaving in and out of traffic (cue the idiot last week on southbound I-5 at the Enchanted Forest exit who passed up the hill on the shoulder on a two-lane highway; when I saw him fishtail going nearly 80 mph I wondered aloud if it was my responsibility to call the cops and ambulance when he was so recklessly endangering others).



Anyway, the top ten states are listed in this Forbes Magazine article.



SPEEDING

That Green Gloop DOESN'T Have Much Avocado In It

A bi like the Monty Python cheese shop skit in which said establishment was totally devoid of the fermented curd, now a lady has brought forth a suit against one of America's largest food manufacturers, Kraft, for foisting a "guacamole" product on the American public that contains less than 2% avocado in it. Well, of course, all those food technicians can work late into the night creating all sorts of approximations of food with a bevy of ingredients, none of which are actually related to the avocado in any way, shape or form.


Gotta love the quote from the Kraft representative: "We think customers understand that it isn’t made from avocado,” said Claire Regan, Kraft Foods’ vice president of corporate affairs.. Maybe in the back of our minds we would've liked to have thought that there was more of it than that little tiny bit, but the rest of our brain would tell us we shouldn't be surprised that it's just a mix of those varying ingredients.





THEY'RE MAKING "GUACAMOLE" ALL NIGHT LONG




Wonder if that Kraft lawyers are acting like the beloved lawyer Lionel Hutz?

When Cellphones Are Outlawed.......

Outlaws may not the only ones owning them, but the Zimbabwe military is concerned that cellphone operators using systems not controlled by the state are a grave concern to national security. Of course it's for the best for all of us, one can never be too sure in things like this. So said the frog in the pan on the top of the stove.




ZIMBABWE

Anti-War In Iraq Sign? Of Satan? It's A Freakin' Wreath

Because everything in this world is a symbol for something else, some Colorado members of a homeowners association are up in arms over what exactly a Christmas wreath in the shape of the peace sign signifies. Umm, how about not much? Is that too difficult of a concept to handle?




WREATH